Letters for Life

most enlightening was how the Rebbe interpreted G-d’s constant ‘look.’ In earlier Chasidic teachings, this concept is primarily taught as a meditation to inspire awe of Heaven, as a warning to keep one’s behavior in check. But the Rebbe was teaching me that G-d’s constant ‘look’ should inspire confidence! You’re not alone in life. G-d is there for you, He cares about you, He is at your side. You can feel empowered. You can feel strong.

Sometimes, under a heap of emotional turmoil, there might simply be a neglected body. “It appears,” reads a letter to a middle-aged man, that you are not properly taking care of your bodily health. Naturally, it is impossible that this won’t also affect your emotional health, as explained in the well-known teaching of the Maggid of Mezeritch to his son, that “a small hole in the body causes a big hole in the soul.” Therefore, if you will take my advice, you should watch your health in the most literal sense-eating, drinking, sleeping, and so on- and this will be good for you spiritually as well

Trust is synonymous with calm. Have you ever sat in a cab or in a friend’s car and thought, “I just don’t trust this driver”? The road might be clear, but your heart can’t stop its uneasy thumping. You keep anxiously checking out the window. You know it won’t help you. It doesn’t matter. You’re worried. Compare that experience with the times you were convinced of your driver’s responsibility and good judgment. When you trust the driver, you can sit at ease and let your mind wander. You may not know what the next turn will bring, but you’re calm. You feel you’re in good hands. That feeling is bitachon.

“G-d will bless you in all that you do,” indicating that proactive doing is absolutely vital to receiving the blessing of success.

Ask yourself what the end result of these self-reproachful thoughts will be. Will they lead you to do good, to improve yourself, to be more productive? Or will they lead you to self-doubt, despair, and stagnation? If the answer is the latter, however profound and virtuous the thoughts seem, you can be sure they stem from the yetzer hara

A young man once wrote to the Rebbe about his struggles with stuttering. After advising him to consult a specialist, the Rebbe added: A practical piece of advice: When you feel that the word you are about to speak is difficult for you to verbalize, do not force yourself to say that word immediately; go back a word or two, or speak about something else. When you alleviate yourself of the tension, the situation will naturally improve

The Rebbe constantly encouraged people to leave the nerve-wracking solitude of their minds and discuss their dilemmas with caring and trustworthy individuals-wise mentors, impartial family members, and “knowledgeable friends” ... He would explain how others pull you out of your subjective ruminations and-with their cumulated life experience, calming words, and practical advice-help you understand that such challenges are normal, people have been here before, and there are tried and true ways to navigate this safely. You need only take the first vulnerable step of reaching out.

See also Igrot Kodesh, Vol. 27, p. 189, for a letter encouraging Rabbi Simchah Raz to publish a biography on the “tzadik of Jerusalem” (Rabbi Aryeh Levin, 1885-1969): “I haven’t met him in person, and my acquaintance with him was only through correspondence by mail and hearing reports of his most exalted activities. Thus, it is hard for me to give an opinion on the specifics of what to emphasize in his biography. “However, it is of vital importance to publicize his way of life and accomplishments. Especially in our times, when the youth are wandering in tangled paths, and have only succeeded in ‘shattering the [false] idols’ [see Bereishit Rabbah 38:13] of the previous generation, but not as of yet in finding their own way in life; and because of their great yearning for true meaning, and because of their great fear of emptiness, they ‘grope around in the dark’ [see Deuteronomy 28:29] and hang on to all types of ideologies. Thus, it is of tremendous value to have a book from which they can learn about a man who has just lived among them, and, though educated in the past generation, had deep bonds with the most progressive of our times…. Though I cannot give an opinion on the details, when I read the draft you sent I have become even more convinced of the book’s vital necessity. May you be blessed for taking it on yourself.”

“Joseph cried over the two [plural] Temples destined to be destroyed in the tribal territory of Benjamin. Benjamin cried over the [single] tabernacle of Shiloh that was destined to be destroyed in the tribal territory of Joseph.” The brothers cried for each other. But, the Rebbe noted, this story is quite strange. While they surely cared about each other, “a person is their own closest relative,” and the future of their own temples must have mattered to them too. Why were they only crying about the other’s temple? This captures a powerful idea: If you see a friend destroying their personal “temple,” of course you must do what you can to help. You can talk to them, advise them, encourage them-but in the end, it’s up to them. It’s their choice. After you exhaust your efforts, the sympathetic heart is left to cry, helplessly watching a friend’s temple going up in flames. But if your own temple is being destroyed? Don’t cry-do something! That is in your hands to change-so don’t wallow in misery, don’t be satisfied with tears, get on it! Thus, Joseph and Benjamin cried for each other’s temples. For their own temples, they weren’t going to cry. They were going to do something.